Tanna Marie (part I)
E2

Tanna Marie (part I)

Unknown Speaker 0:00
You're listening to local programming produced in KU NV studios. The content of this program does not reflect the views or opinions of 91.5 Jas and more the University of Nevada Las Vegas or the Board of Regents of the Nevada System of Higher Education.

Unknown Speaker 0:16
You're listening to rebel radio with your host Malika Bella lyrics locals love on the rebel HD two

Unknown Speaker 0:40
what's good everybody welcome back to rebel Radio. I'm your host Malika Bella here with our very first guest Anna Marie farmer farmer. So before we get into intros and stuff like that, I do want to play a game right to get our creative juices flowing. So it's just a quick word association. I'm gonna say like a word or a phrase, and then you do that call response. You say whatever comes to mind. Instinctively there's no right or wrong answer. It's crazy. Just go for it. Go for it. So there's like five or so words. Okay. I mean, we could go on forever, but I'll limit myself here. First one Vegas, Golden Knights. Motivation.

Unknown Speaker 1:23
Myself. Fear. Worthy unworthy came up. I don't know why but

Unknown Speaker 1:29
regret. Don't have it. Happiness, Oregon

Unknown Speaker 1:33
on it. Music life. I was supposed to keep these at one word, but I couldn't. I was like, no, no,

Unknown Speaker 1:40
like word or phrase. Whatever comes to mind. As long as it's not a novel. We're good. We're good. So we'll come back to those. Okay, and hopefully they'll, I don't know, seamlessly make their way into like themes throughout this episode. But who is Tana Marie?

Unknown Speaker 1:56
You know, I'm constantly searching for that. Who is Tana Marie? Tana Marie is a musician, an artist, a lover? A very vocal. What should I say? How should I put this observant person who's not afraid? To say how she feels? I'm a mother. A healer? To some? And yeah, I think it just overall, just artists and all sense of the form.

Unknown Speaker 2:35
Yeah. And I can attest to that. From what I've seen and heard just oh my goodness, I'm obsessed. Obsessed is an understatement. Trust me right now you're like, Oh, she's she's a little cool. But then afterwards, you're gonna be like, this girl gotta like give me some space. So with all of those words, even with like healer, and artists and everything, I think that they, they all intertwine to who you are as a person, but I think they intertwine not only unique to you they intertwine together could be like, as a healer, what art do you use to, you know, express yourself and maybe heal yourself but also healing others because they can get their own connotations through your work. And it can mean something entirely different, but still help them through something in their life. Yes, I think that's the beauty of music and beauty of art. In general.

Unknown Speaker 3:23
It is healing others, I feel like helping others in general is always easier than helping yourself. And my music is the one way I helped myself that I've been consistent with. It's like the one way that I found the one thing that I found, besides like painting and things like that, but like music really helps me get out words and things that I'm feeling in a way that's healthier. And I don't know, it always comes back to music and poetry or lyricism in general. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker 3:51
Just really a way to process things and be like, yes. How does this feel in this moment?

Unknown Speaker 3:58
Yes. Because at that, I feel like you're Conn's. We're constantly growing, right? We're constantly changing. So my music is constantly changing, like I do different things based on what I feel in that moment. And I feel like as I grow and find myself in different ways, you know, you go through those pits and those road bumps of something really happening or really bad, heavy, and trying to censor myself, y'all. When you have something that like happens that is not ideal. And it forces you to have to like look inward when someone else hurts you It forces you to look at yourself to like you. Why, why does it hurt you so much like taking accountability, all those things, it can be hard, but like it makes you constantly have to change and and with that my music has grown and changed and even my voice in general. So it's been fun. It's been fun changing and growing and seeing how my music, like reflects that.

Unknown Speaker 4:54
Yeah, and I think that you're one of the few to actually, at least in my experience That's right. As an artist, one of the few to be upfront about that, because a lot of times people try to put themselves in a box or maybe other people put them in a box that they like, Okay, this is my sound, this is what I'm going to own, I'm going to perfect this. And that can go in like literally for like, lyrics or genre or their style or all of the above. So I'm interested in, I kind of know the answer, but I'm interested in, you know, what do you think of your personal sound and your genres and everything that you've been going through throughout the years? Like, what is your sound now? Who,

Unknown Speaker 5:34
I think it's been so consistent, I've had a few interviews where they asked me that, and it's, it's funny, because it still hasn't changed. I'm like, I don't know that I have a sound like, if anything, it's the sound of sincerity. Everything that's in my lyrics is true to what I'm feeling in that moment. It's true to myself, whether it's being very vulnerable, or very goofy, or fun, or whatever it is, in that moment. It's very true to me in that moment. And I'm sure everyone feels that way about their music, but I tend to be more I guess, in the realm of r&b soul. But I mean, when I write I write stuff for country, I write stuff for pop, I write everything. And sometimes there's things where I'm like, I don't know if this song is even really, for me, or if I should write this for someone else. But I love music so much, and so many different types of genres of music that I feel like my music doesn't really have a particular sound. I don't know. I'm working. I'm working on trying to really like hone in what is my sound, but I don't know, you could hear a rock song from me in a weekend, it's still be like, yeah, that's still Tana, like, I don't know why, but it's like, and this isn't to, like, boast, but like, or like, hype myself up. But it's like, whatever genre I try to do, because the lyrics are still coming from me. And the sound is still very me, it's me, even if I do like rock or this or that. And I don't know, I just feel like I don't have a box to be put in. And I hate boxes I hate. But I have a whole poem about that. But that person would not like me to do that. But yeah, I really, very much don't have a genre. I don't think if someone had to put me in one. I would say it's r&b soul.

Unknown Speaker 7:17
Okay, yeah. And I 100% love that. You don't want to put yourself in a box. Because sometimes people do that unintentionally, too. And then years later, you're like, man, I've been in this like this whole time. Why did I do that to myself kind of thing. But what I really love about it as a fan right from the other side. We're

Unknown Speaker 7:36
so crazy. Sorry, fan. I'm like I have a fan. It's so crazy. Anytime says they're a fan of mine. Like that word is so crazy. Number One Fan.

Unknown Speaker 7:45
So as a fan, I see that like, I guess I'm a weird fan too. Like overall with any genre any music because a lot of times people are like, Oh, what's your favorite type of music, it's this, this and this and they list like their top three genres or something? Or their top three artists bands, whatever it is. And I kind of, I don't know, I have this eclectic music taste of literally, honestly any type of sound and it's because I'm like, Wow, that really gets the body moving or like it releases something primitive in me that I'm like, wow, we really it's a way to create community together. So that's where I'm like, this elevated idea of music maybe I'm just not reaching that you know what people's like tastes and like what they acquire all of that. But deep down I'm like, Wow, I like and appreciate like so many different types of sounds and

Unknown Speaker 8:34
music. So that's what makes you a great interviewer. Because when you like so many things like for example I can relate to you. You can find anything from corn to Japanese smooth jazz on and like bluegrass like you can find a lot of things on if you go to my like my like music and just scroll and be like, okay, random didn't think this would be on here. Metal punk like everything I in when I think Are you someone who really likes lyrics? Yeah, so then it really doesn't matter. Because to me, I'm the same way I love lyricism. So it doesn't matter what something sounds like if the delivery is if it's delivered in a certain way.

Unknown Speaker 9:10
Very true. Very true. I feel like this is a therapy session, be like thinking about myself. And I'm like, Wow, you are so right. This is explaining the years of no. So I love that that's a good byproduct of this.

Unknown Speaker 9:25
But if your insurance covers this

Unknown Speaker 9:28
so going back to me being like okay, as a fan, right? In my perspective, I don't necessarily look to you because you're r&b soul or like because you're rock or because you're this or even like you do spoken word and like poetry. It's all of the above, right. Tana Murray is the genre and I am listening because it's from Penna. Right. So that's so cool. Like that is genuinely me. So everything that you put out, I'm like, Wow, just genius. genius every single time. And I'm like, and this sounds so cheesy, but I'm like, I did not think she could outdo herself. She did it again. And it's just like leveling up every time wait till you hear the new stuff I have, I have been so excited about the new stuff that I have that's dropping

Unknown Speaker 10:16
stuff that just dropped. Home is like the newest newest but escape I wrote a year and a half ago, like so the stuff that I'm writing right now, the stuff that I'm about to release right now I'm playing guitar on some of it. Like, I have really like, I'm having so much fun again, like with the things that I'm doing. And it's, it's exciting. As if you're a fan, like the fan that you say you are, I was like, just get it, you're gonna be like, Oh my God, there's more. I just like I want to be like those commercials with with negatives. Like, wait, there's more. And I don't make a song. Like when I'm thinking about something, I don't go, Oh, I hope this is better than last time, I really just make something in that moment. And if I like it, I like it. And I write. So if I showed you the amount of Voice Memos I have, from just like me sitting in the house or in the car, and like song ideas and like poems like it's ridiculous.

Unknown Speaker 11:17
It's ridiculous. Honestly, like 2% of it. I feel like because you're all in there. And it's like when you have time to record. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 11:25
I might give you guys a sneak peek tonight. On one of my songs that who told you it's one of my favorite things I've worked on. I'll give you a little sneak peek of that.

Unknown Speaker 11:38
So stay tuned. Don't miss my producers listening to this. Noise I'm sorry. Well, I'm excited for that. Thank you. I think I'm such the fan that I say I am because I've had the pleasure of seeing you live. And that's when I was hooked, right? And I guess I don't know how people encounter like different types of music, right? Maybe it's through a friend, maybe it's just something that's popular, whatever, maybe through like a soundtrack and a movie. Like that's how I find a lot of music that I like. But being there live, just this charismatic presence that I'm like, oh my like jaw dropping to the ground. I'm not just oh, my God, one

Unknown Speaker 12:19
of my favorite places to be. So thank you for seeing that. Because when I'm on stage, it's really hard to explain. I feel the most myself on stage. You know how most people they go up on stage, they've said like, Oh, this is my alter ego.

Unknown Speaker 12:33
Oh yeah,

Unknown Speaker 12:34
I'm the opposite. This person that's outside of the stage just kind of feels like my alter ego. And on stage, that person who has had zero EFS to give and just like, is fearless and raw and confident. And just that is truly me. And somehow, when I'm off the stage now, it's better now I am very much still that person now. But when I'm off the stage, it's almost feels like I feel more like naked. When I'm on stage. And I get to be in my comfort level. I feel seen I feel powerful. I feel like, like I can talk to people through my music and the things that I'm feeling. And then when I get off stage, it's like, this kind of shy, awkward person comes back. And it's crazy. Because like, for most people, it's the opposite. And I don't know how to explain it. I'll work on it with my therapist. I just saw her today. So, um, remember to bring that up to her.

Unknown Speaker 13:31
What does this mean and mental notes.

Unknown Speaker 13:35
good topic for next therapy. We need that.

Unknown Speaker 13:38
Well, I love that. That's you really coming into yourself that you're like, Wow, this is something that maybe I don't want to put more words in your mouth to so you'd be like, I did not say that. With the squinting and everything. But where you really feel your true calling. Right. So what was your journey into music and becoming an artist? Um,

Unknown Speaker 14:02
I've loved music my whole life. My mom was a singer. I didn't sing a lot around her though, because she was great. And I was not when I was younger, obviously just starting, and I was really intimidated. And it wasn't until I went to Virginia to get my cosmetology license. I worked under my aunt and friend out there who's also he's he's an amazing rapper. I mean, he's been on sway he's he's doing huge stuff right now touring stuff, but like, Kane, he, me and him are just talking music. He asked me to be on his album, I featured and I did my first show with him which by the way, I bombed horrible because it was a live band. I've never had to sing with a live band at that time. And so like anyone who knows and does music knows that like, it is completely different when you have a live band behind you, especially if you don't have ears like you can't hear. It was horrible. I cried that night. I told him I was so sorry. He's like Tana is good. It's one show. And this competition came out in Virginia and it was is like kind of like a Fredericksburg idol. They're saying like it was like the their little town idol thing. And it was country idol first and I don't really sing country, but I was like, Oh, I like some country songs. And I auditioned in the mall, and made it to like the fifth place or whatever. And then they did Fredericksburg, which was all genres. And I was like, Oh, well, they're like, they called me and they're like, You need to audition for this one. Because like you can do with the genre one, and then winning that one. Even though I didn't want to do it. I just kept thinking, like, just try it. From there. I was like, I started doing some beer festivals and stuff and wine festivals there. I won like a recording contract. But I moved back before I was able to do anything with it. And when I moved back, my whole life was about my ex husband and kind of like his stuff. And then I had a baby. And when we got divorced, we split. And that like broke me in a way that I had never been broken before. And I've been through a lot. So like that was just really hard. And I kind of just was like, What do I like to do outside of being a mom and like, who I thought I was like, my whole life was about my ex husband. So like, when I started figuring out what I like to do, it always came back to music. And I just went to an open mic. And from there I like when I can't be dramatic with this. I went to two open mics. First was at campfire, rebar, and met some amazing people, and then went to the jam. Kind of just took the mic Beverly chills to this day is like, I'll never forget you just taking the mic. And he's like, Who is this? Like, and I took the mic and they're like, Oh, my God, and then I sang. And then they're like, can you feature next week? And I was like, Sure. And then it was just boom, boom, boom, like, I started kind of performing everywhere. And I was like, How is this happening? Like, What is even happening and like, it was so quick and so fast. And then I recorded and then I recorded during the pandemic, when everything shut down. I was like the first time I've recorded my songs. So it was crazy. And then from there, it just went, and I've been blessed that people support my music and what I do, because there's days where I'm like, there's so many better artists than me, but like, at the same time, I know I'm there, I do have a way of crafting words that I think is beyond me. Like that's something I was blessed with that I would be, it would be rude of me to ignore that God gave me a gift that like does help people feel the things that I've felt and like connect. I've really had people stop me and be like, Yo, like, I connected with so much with the words on that. And maybe it means something different to them. But like, I truly feel like my purpose in this life is to help others and part of that is through music. I don't know the other parts. But yeah, that was a long winded way of telling you how I got into music and no,

Unknown Speaker 17:41
I'm just like absorbing everything. Oh, my goodness. I'm going back real quick to how you said yeah, you know, like, it's spectrum right? There. There may be artists who are better than you and I need to say there are definitely artists that are, you know, not as good as you and honestly really terrible one in the room right here.

Unknown Speaker 18:03
No self deprecation. Okay, my therapist told me, We don't self deprecating.

Unknown Speaker 18:08
is my way of therapy actually comedic or leave me

Unknown Speaker 18:12
to humor is my thing. dark humor?

Unknown Speaker 18:16
Yeah, actually, yes. But no, I really love that entire story. Because music has always been something in your life. It's been important. It's been, you know, this foundation. And now throughout over the years, you know, all these different experiences that you've had some good, some bad, it really has been something that's tethered you to your purpose, right, and maybe you didn't maybe you didn't know at the time that you know, music would be your calling, but you knew that it was something with you throughout the way. So I knew

Unknown Speaker 18:48
music was the only thing that was going to keep me alive. I was very suicidal at the time. Just I love my son. But like nothing was worth like I was just I felt like a failure in so many ways. And people don't talk about how when a marriage fails or a relationship, you feel like a failure. And I struggle really hard with failing. And it's funny because I see it in my six year old. And I have to remind him like, now failing is the first attempt in learning like that's what it stands for fail its first attempt to learning and like I saw that somewhere and I was like, I'm taking that and I'm running with it. Now, I will fail. I will purposely fail because then I find something in that failure. But I used to be so afraid of failing and fit like there's still a portion of me that is but when it comes to my music, I don't care about making a mistake or maybe one personally likes that song. I've learned something from that song that I made. So like I'm very fearless when it comes to my music. I'll do anything and try it.

Unknown Speaker 19:42
Yeah, yeah. It's really fun about it though.

Unknown Speaker 19:45
I think so I think that is really fun. Those Yeah, adding your spice. Let's see, I'm jumping out without a parachute when I do music, like it's just like let's do this. And

Unknown Speaker 19:54
so Okay, again, I did a lot of research so but something that I I personally like throughout my collegiate career, my professional career, like all the things that I do at UNLV I don't wanna make this about me, so I can cut it out, whatever. But just for context about you

Unknown Speaker 20:11
to your you matter,

Unknown Speaker 20:14
do it. So, I actually had the privilege of teaching for a couple semesters, First Year Seminar students. So those are freshmen coming in either transfer students, or maybe it's their first time in college period. And I themed my class around revisiting your inner child, because I think that a lot of times, especially like in this college space, right, it's that in between, it's like, for a traditional student, at least, but you know, being an adult, and being like, oh, oh, damn, like, now I have to pay bills, bills, or like, I have to do like, adulting, whatever that can be, right? And maybe you're on your own or maybe, you know, it's just this new environment with different people that you've never like been surrounded with before. Just that whole transitional space. So I themed the class around, you know, revisiting who you were and who you want to be right and kindling connection with that, that inner version of you. And in previous interviews that I've stalked, I've seen that you have that theme as well. And even you talking about your son, like the whole failure thing. I saw that you made a song for children, right? Yeah. Failure is learning.

Unknown Speaker 21:19
Oh, my gosh, their homework, y'all. She's a real.

Unknown Speaker 21:23
I'm an education. But yeah, I don't know if you want to talk about that way. Yes.

Unknown Speaker 21:28
So big head bob. David Bradley is the author a good friend of mine, shout out to you, David. Big head bob is a part of the Bob squad me and my son were little hummingbirds in the last last book they just released which is so sweet. But um, he, he told me about this, we met and we talked about, like, my goals. And he told me about like, the things he was doing big head, Bob, and he's like, hey, I want to do a video I did one with another artist and I love your music. Can we do a video or like, make a song about this, and I got together with a good friend of mine. And we he produced the beat for me. And we, I wrote the song failures, learning because I'm like, I wanted something that like, was still like, anyone would want to listen to it. Because as parents, sometimes you get tired of hearing certain songs. And I was like, okay, would a parent be like, Oh, my God, turn that off? You don't I mean, like, Sharkbait Yes. You know what I mean? So I was like, what if something were like parents would be okay with listening to it, but kids would also like, catch on to it. And the theme was like, learning failures, learning, and I'm like, okay, like, let's, let's run with it. Like, it's okay to be afraid to like fall and like, do all the things but like getting through it. So that was like a really special thing for me. Because it it was my son is so special to me. So it was like an ode to him, but also just kids in general. And that was like one of the coolest things I've done, like, knowing that like, I have worked with an author and who is a Crystal Award Las Vegas crystal book award winning author. That's pretty dope shout out to David Barbara prefer. It was really, really cool. But yeah, that's that that song, in that video is like the cutest thing ever. And I'm super proud of it.

Unknown Speaker 23:09
I could talk to you about this forever, because I just love like hummingbirds specifically mean a lot to me. And I love all birds, all animals really even like a roach on the ground. I relate to it the most. You cannot kill me. Yeah, I'm like, indestructible, you know. So something that I want to do like, eventually. And maybe this is like a way this is a stepping stone like this show. Yeah, could be a way into that. But, you know, I'm okay. Being on stage. I've done a lot of things like in front of different crowds. And it could be like professional environments or not so professional, whatever. And I feel not at home, but I feel like it's natural within me. And then that's why pre show I was like, Oh my God, I feel so nervous about this. Because it's like, it's intimate. And I think that I'm just, it's easier for me to look into a crowd and not really see one face and just see a lot of strangers. Yep. And I'm like, Oh, they don't. I don't really like care what they think of me because I don't know them like that. Yeah. But then here, I'm like, oh, like I care what you think. And I'm like, Oh, no. But all of that to say that I want to do spoken word right. And you talking about like this theme of failure, something that I actually just submitted, not spoken word related, but it is like, just like verbiage and like all this stuff. submitted it yesterday, I think and it said something to the effect of without learning to fail. We fail to learn kind of thing. And I don't know if that's been said like it's probably out there and it's like quotes on the wall or something. Yeah. But that came to me and it makes sense in the whole piece. But I just 100% believe that. And I think as as young children we should be taught that.

Unknown Speaker 24:51
I think people do their best to win they're not afraid of failing. When I first did poet started writing poetry. I was like, I'm not a poet. It took my Get friends to be like, till I had a poem, like literally published and they're like, you're a poet, stop saying you're not a poet and I'm like, Okay. And then my first ever in person slam contest, I went as a joke against my ex boyfriend at the time, too. So it's pretty funny. And one, and I was like, oh my god, like, I wasn't one. I was like, what? It was so wild. And because I'm like, I'm just, I'm just a singer, like, who happens to be good at words with words, you know? And when I did that, I was like, I'm a whole poet out here. You are, though.

Unknown Speaker 25:33
You are. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 25:34
it's, it's crazy. I think I just don't like labels. You know, because I'm also queer and like, as a bisexual person, I guess? pantsy I don't know. Like, I hate labels. I'm like, why do we have to label things? Why can't we just exist? And be who we need to be? Like, why does the world need to see like, what are you? Like, wear it on your sleeve? Like people are like, Why don't you have like a pride flag in your bio, or this? I was like, I do it on tick tock, but not like on Instagram and stuff. And like, because, to me, it's really none of your business. Like, unless we're talking like, yeah, why do you want to know, do you wanna hang out with me? You know, I mean, like, gonna get to know me, but like, I just don't like labels. I know, labels are important to some people. But for me, they're not really that important. Yeah. And they can be changed at any time. It's like, what's the point of a label when like, we're not boxes of pasta? Yeah. And I mean, like, we can change know, as much as I love pasta. Like, I'm a carb girl, you know, I'm saying, but like, we're not like some shelf stable food that stays the same. We change, we grow, we evolve. Like, there's no point in labeling something. Because what you are today, you may not be tomorrow, you may not be a week from now. So I don't want to label myself anything. Because what if I'm not? Yeah, I hate if you can't tell I hate being constrained. Like, don't, don't put me in one thing, like I am so many things. I'm more than just my music. I'm more. I'm just like, I'm a human experiencing life, just like everybody else. I'm not perfect. And that's what makes me pretty dope. It

Unknown Speaker 27:04
does. I really does. And I've had similar conversations with different people, with family members, with friends, whoever. Like when people ask, I'm like, Oh, I guess I could say that. I'm Pan, right? And I'm like, well, well, and I kind of do that to like, fit into their box for their world, to like their mind to wrap around something and understand it. Yeah. But really, to me, I'm like, I don't, I don't really care. It's just a label. It's just another form of a box that you're like, I don't need that.

Unknown Speaker 27:32
So that's someone they're like, Well, are you really buying your pan? I've only seen you with men like and I'm like,

Unknown Speaker 27:38
who you like I'm not like, you know what I mean? Like, now you're keeping tabs. Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 27:43
I know. You're saying I was like, it's just, I don't know, I guess I'm like, you know, some people if they feel comfortable knowing if you're a certain type of person or way, I guess because it helps them but like, for me, I'm like, Look, whatever helps you but I'm not labeling myself. I'm barely human. Thursdays I'm just like, You know what, beam me up, Scotty. I feel like I'm more alien than human these days. But, and

Unknown Speaker 28:07
I think that's a perfect segue though. Because you are a Vegas native. Right? And earlier we talked about like that those word association words, I guess. So Vegas was one of them. And then you say golden night? Yeah, so I know the story. But if you want to talk a little bit about it. Um,

Unknown Speaker 28:23
so my song being played at the Golden Knights? Yeah, gumbo. That was so that was unbeknownst to me. And honestly, it was I'm really sad because it was before. Like, they used to like invite the artists to the game so they could see it there live and I was adding let's do that. So Mark, Chuck, if you're out there and you're listening, I have new music and I would love I would love to do it again. You know, just shameless plug. But it was so it was so cool to have and there's been so many of my artists friends who have had that opportunity to So what they're doing for local artists is amazing. It's so nice because local artists don't get enough love out here. It's really hard when you are in a tourism place and they care more about the people who are making the millions in stadiums United mean so it's really hard but being from Vegas, like the Golden Knights to like that was our first team that was like from here raised here. Same with aces. I'm such a huge aces fan, but in so many games love them to death. I will sing the national anthem at both of those one day. Yeah, you will at the ACES game and the Golden Knights game it will happen. I've done it for you and I'll be at the baseball games basketball games. That's been really dope but in UFC that was really fun, but I manifesting that that'll happen. That's it you're gonna have to tap in with me at Tana Murray sings on all platforms.

Unknown Speaker 29:42
Thank you for listening to rebel radio with Malika Bella lyrics locals love on the rebel HD two

Transcribed by https://otter.ai